My Shoebox

At long last I have uploaded pics of my pad for all to enjoy. Feel free to be jealous as I expect nothing less. Welcome to my pad, don't forget to take off your shoes and please, mind the mess.

This first picture is of the "Grand Room". On the far wall is the entrance to the laundry/make-up room and the door to my look-in closet. In between the two doors are the broken mirror pieces that I glued to the wall. If you will recall these are the shards of glass that were responsible for removing a dime-sized piece of flesh from the palm of my hand. As an update to that blog I will have you know that the wondrous healing power of my body has filled in the hole with brand new skin. The only problem is that the skin is just a tad bit too taut so when I flex my hand back all the way I get a little squigey in my belly when it stops giving.

This picture is of the main foyer, the kitchen, the office and the library (above the stove). You'll notice that the two burner stove really allows me to explore my culinary genius.

Please take a moment to regard the state of the art airconditioning unit located beside the t.v. It really is ridiculous to live in such luxury.





This is a more close-up view of the laundry/make-up room. This room is not heated and lacks double paning on the windows so you can imagine how "refreshing" it is early in the morning when getting ready for work. My self-made vanity on the floor is constructed of a spare shelf from my cupboard and two barbells. A feat of true ingenuity.












This is a shot of the main foyer and the mud room. I got the manican on the right out of the garbage, carved a square through the stomach, drizzled a broken can of spraypaint over it, impaled it with a mop and adorned it with a wig. It was originally supposed to serve as a coat rack but I much prefer just throwing my coat on the floor or on a nearby chair instead. Although this isn't exactly a preference but rather a necessity.

You see, I have inherited my mom's "getting home from work, opening the door dance". I have read somewhere that teacher's are some of the most likely people to get urinary tract infections because they don't have enough time to use the toilet throughout the day. Although I haven't yet gotten any infection I do realize just at the very second that I start looking for my house key just how much I have to go to the bathroom. So, everyday I do a little dance while I open the door. When I get it open I launch all of my belongings into the main room as I kick off my shoes and pause for a moment to ensure that I don't lose control. Finally, and always at the very LAST second, I make it to the toilet.


That being said this is a view of the bathroom. The shower and the sink are one glorious, space-saving contraption that no matter what time of day I try taking a shower never produce water hot enough to be comfortable.













This picture was taken from my desk looking at the stunted refrigerator capped with some box that I put my clothes in. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, these doors as well as the one attached to my closet are never closed.

On the wall next to the refrigerator is the phone that leads to the call box on the other side of my main door. This seems all a bit excessive to me seeing as I could easily have a conversation with someone standing outside of my apartment from the chair in my laundry room clear on the other side of my apartment. Another oddity is that this call box is also the speaker for my doorbell. Now, as I know it doorbells are only necessary for people living in houses so large that they might not hear a knock on the front door. I'm pretty sure that if you were to put one end of a shoebox to your ear and tap lightly on the other end you would hear it quite clearly. The same goes for this shoebox that I call home. The super fun part about my doorbell however, is that it plays....get this......wait for it..... "Yankee Doodle Dandy".